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Merdeka!
1 month ago
Friday, December 4, 2009
Thursday, December 3, 2009
Antu oh Antu
Recently I posted a comment on my FB account regarding ghost stories on tv....the Malay ghost stories are even worse - Jangan Pandang Belakang, Jangan Tegur, Jangan Tegur...lagi (dah tak bagi tegur tetiba ade perkataan 'lagi' plak). You know why I hated my kids sit in front of the tv and watch ghost stories especially Mimi (coz Syadiya is still too young to understand what is fear and afraid of ghosts), I need to accompany her to the toilet or she will be having nightmares...I on the other hand loves to watch ghost stories and I am a big fan of all ghost stories...I can get rid of all the scary images once I'm out of the cinema or after I have switch off the tv (buat ape nak ingat2 seme tuh, sekadar tengok je lah) but nowadays...you can definitely say that I am as scared as Mimi...yup too many...too many ghost stories and it is almost every day on tv even the during commercials (kadang2 iklan lagi menakutkan...) plus it is even scarier when Faizul (my dearie hubby)is not at home.
And one more thing...like what i had mentioned on my FB status, the Malays often inherit the 'saka' to the next generations...poor thing!If I were to inherit 'saka' from my ancestors I will be swearing and cursing my ancestors my whole life.Alhamdulillah...I am not one of those people who has to suffer from the evil deeds due to what the older generations did...janganlah mewariskan saka tapi wariskan lah harta atau ilmu kepada anak2 kita.
Sunday, November 22, 2009
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
I don't trust you...
Yes...I don't trust you at all. You may look like you are one of the nicest person in the world...nampak cam baik jer...ibu mithali gitu!!!but the truth is...ko mmg kaki perli orang kan...mmg sesuka hati jer nak mengenakan org kan...aku rasa baik lagi lah aku nih walaupun kecoh2 dan huha huha tapi aku takdelah nak menyindir sesape...kalo aku rasa patut cakap mmg aku akan cakap...tapi ko aku tgk dah banyak kali dah nak mengenakan aku...kang silap haribulan kang aku mengamuk lagi dasyhat dari ko...so ko pikir2kan lah diri ko tuh....jangan asyik nak perli2 aku...aku kalo dah benci kat org mmg payah nak suka balik kat org tuh..tapi tak heran sbb aku rasa starting next year aku takkan berhubungan ngan ko lagi-THE END-
Therapeutic goals and aims of the following 4 schools of psychotherapy.
a) Psychoanalytic
The school of psychoanalytic focuses on a one-on-one session between therapist and the client. One of the aims and goals of psychoanalytic therapeutic is to bring the unconscious to conscious. In order to do so, the therapist will need look at any significant events that are useful in understanding about the client’s problems. The therapist will try to relate any significant events that had occurred to the client during infancy or early childhood with the client’s internal conflict. Thus, the therapist will relate the client’s current situation and what had happened in his or her early life.
The role of psychoanalytic therapist is to look at the conscious and the subconscious mind. It is through the conscious and subconscious mind that we can understand about the “here and now”. Another therapeutic goal and aim of this school is to share the burden that the client is facing and this can be done using transference.
Transference is a condition in which the client begins to consider his/her therapist in the same emotional way he/she would consider a person in his/her lives. For example, one of the parents or siblings of the client that brings a significant meaning in the client’s life. All in all, psychoanalytic aims or goals are to help the client better understand his/her conflicts and how to resolve them.
b) Behavioral
The behavioral school is interested in the change of behaviour as the result from the stimuli that we obtained. The result or the outcome of the stimuli that we carry out will help us to learn more about our own behaviour. It is through the changed of our behaviour that we learn about our new behaviour and what motivates us to either change or remain the same. Therefore, the behavioral school will focus on factors influencing behaviour and what are things that can be done regarding problematic behaviours. The behavioral approach requires permanent behavioral change or potential behavioral change.
The process of learning can affects our behaviour. For example, if we procrastinate and do a last minute assignment will not allow us to produce excellent work, therefore the next time we receive an assignment we must not procrastinate and must do it immediately. Basically, the behavioral approach suggested that we eliminate bad or unpleasant behaviours and learn more effective behaviours.
The behavioral therapeutic goals have got nothing to do with the past. It concentrates more on “here and now”. Furthermore, it focuses on how our behaviour can cause some issues with other people. For instance, our positive behaviour will also produce positive outcomes that will benefit others. Otherwise, our negative behaviours will lead towards pessimistic views from others. Overall, the aims and goals of the behaviour therapy are to provide more personal choice and effective living, to enable the client to distinguish between a positive and negative behaviour, therefore to eliminate the bad and unpleasant behaviour.
c) Humanistic – Person centered and GestaltPerson centered
A person-centered therapy is a nondirective approach which means that the therapist does not lead or to suggest anything to the client due to the belief that a client is capable of self-directed growth. However, the therapist and the client have connection which means that the client trust the therapist and willing to share his/her feelings with the therapist. A therapist who applies the humanistic approach will encourage the client to talk about their experiences and also share their feelings without fear. The therapist then will try to clarify the client’s feelings. Thus, an individual is seen as a person who is capable to understand and solve his/her own problems provided that he/she is being guided or facilitated. Furthermore, the client is encouraged to know about his/her true self.
The humanistic therapist also emphasizes on empathic listening and giving feedback to the client. Empathetic listening means the ability to listen carefully and try to understand somebody else's feelings or difficulties. The person-centered therapist is trying to create acceptance, openness, trust, caring and understanding. Overall, a person-centered approach emphasizes on unconditional positive regard, empathy, and congruence.
Gestalt
‘Gestalt’ carries the meaning ‘wholeness’ and therefore Gestalt therapy is aiming at a person as a ‘whole’. In other words, an individual is never reduced to parts but is viewed as an integrated whole. The first aim or goal of the Gestalt therapy is to attain awareness through choices and responsibilities. Awareness especially self-awareness is the most important tool that could lead to changes in personality.Gestalt therapy suggests that clients should be aware of themselves and see themselves as a whole and not as certain parts or split off of themselves. Gestalt therapy also considers the uniqueness of an individual.
In addition, the gestalt therapy also focuses on “here and now” but at the same time is trying to relate the present with the past. Clients should also be aware of his/her feelings and focus on the “here and now”. And it is through becoming aware of themselves that the clients will develop self acceptance and the ability to experience more in the "now" without so much interference from the past. Basically, the gestalt therapy is to help the client to achieve awareness and live a more contented life. Therefore, the main aim of Gestalt therapy is to assist the client in discovering his or her own capability. Thus, how the client successfully connects or engages with himself/herself and the people around him/her.
d) Transpersonal – from both Maslow and Existential Perspective
Maslow
Human beings are supposed to seek balanced in life. Therefore, it is through the transpersonal approach that clients can seek balanced in life. Transpersonal therapy acknowledges the spiritual aspect of human beings and focuses on the study of humanity’s highest potential. People are said to have experiences or connections with the higher states of consciousness. According to the transpersonal therapeutic goal, it is true prayer, meditation or expressive work that we can actually reached our higher states of consciousness. Furthermore, the therapeutic goal of the transpersonal approach is mainly concerned with human awareness, the integration of psychological and spiritual experience and the transcendence of self.
The transpersonal therapy aim at helping clients to access and develop a deeper relationship spiritually. The aim or goal for the transpersonal therapist is basically trying to help the client to reach divinity. Hence, we can conclude that the simplest definition for transpersonal psychology is spiritual psychology.
Existential Perspective
The therapeutic approach of existential perspective is that is more interested in helping the client find philosophical meaning by choosing to think and act authentically and responsibly. The aim of existential therapy is to help in finding meaning and purpose in life. It is through the suffering, work and love that we can find meaning and purpose in life. The existential therapy believes that people will continuously discover about themselves and in addition they will determine their purpose and meaning in life.
People often face problems related to anxiety, for example when they deal with problems like isolation, despair or death. Therefore, if the client is being exposed to more a meaningful and significant attitude like love, creativity or authenticity then the client is given the potential or opportunity to change into becoming a better person.
Overall, the existential therapeutic goals or aims are to help the client to become more aware of the possibilities that they have and it stresses more on the client’s self-awareness.
The school of psychoanalytic focuses on a one-on-one session between therapist and the client. One of the aims and goals of psychoanalytic therapeutic is to bring the unconscious to conscious. In order to do so, the therapist will need look at any significant events that are useful in understanding about the client’s problems. The therapist will try to relate any significant events that had occurred to the client during infancy or early childhood with the client’s internal conflict. Thus, the therapist will relate the client’s current situation and what had happened in his or her early life.
The role of psychoanalytic therapist is to look at the conscious and the subconscious mind. It is through the conscious and subconscious mind that we can understand about the “here and now”. Another therapeutic goal and aim of this school is to share the burden that the client is facing and this can be done using transference.
Transference is a condition in which the client begins to consider his/her therapist in the same emotional way he/she would consider a person in his/her lives. For example, one of the parents or siblings of the client that brings a significant meaning in the client’s life. All in all, psychoanalytic aims or goals are to help the client better understand his/her conflicts and how to resolve them.
b) Behavioral
The behavioral school is interested in the change of behaviour as the result from the stimuli that we obtained. The result or the outcome of the stimuli that we carry out will help us to learn more about our own behaviour. It is through the changed of our behaviour that we learn about our new behaviour and what motivates us to either change or remain the same. Therefore, the behavioral school will focus on factors influencing behaviour and what are things that can be done regarding problematic behaviours. The behavioral approach requires permanent behavioral change or potential behavioral change.
The process of learning can affects our behaviour. For example, if we procrastinate and do a last minute assignment will not allow us to produce excellent work, therefore the next time we receive an assignment we must not procrastinate and must do it immediately. Basically, the behavioral approach suggested that we eliminate bad or unpleasant behaviours and learn more effective behaviours.
The behavioral therapeutic goals have got nothing to do with the past. It concentrates more on “here and now”. Furthermore, it focuses on how our behaviour can cause some issues with other people. For instance, our positive behaviour will also produce positive outcomes that will benefit others. Otherwise, our negative behaviours will lead towards pessimistic views from others. Overall, the aims and goals of the behaviour therapy are to provide more personal choice and effective living, to enable the client to distinguish between a positive and negative behaviour, therefore to eliminate the bad and unpleasant behaviour.
c) Humanistic – Person centered and GestaltPerson centered
A person-centered therapy is a nondirective approach which means that the therapist does not lead or to suggest anything to the client due to the belief that a client is capable of self-directed growth. However, the therapist and the client have connection which means that the client trust the therapist and willing to share his/her feelings with the therapist. A therapist who applies the humanistic approach will encourage the client to talk about their experiences and also share their feelings without fear. The therapist then will try to clarify the client’s feelings. Thus, an individual is seen as a person who is capable to understand and solve his/her own problems provided that he/she is being guided or facilitated. Furthermore, the client is encouraged to know about his/her true self.
The humanistic therapist also emphasizes on empathic listening and giving feedback to the client. Empathetic listening means the ability to listen carefully and try to understand somebody else's feelings or difficulties. The person-centered therapist is trying to create acceptance, openness, trust, caring and understanding. Overall, a person-centered approach emphasizes on unconditional positive regard, empathy, and congruence.
Gestalt
‘Gestalt’ carries the meaning ‘wholeness’ and therefore Gestalt therapy is aiming at a person as a ‘whole’. In other words, an individual is never reduced to parts but is viewed as an integrated whole. The first aim or goal of the Gestalt therapy is to attain awareness through choices and responsibilities. Awareness especially self-awareness is the most important tool that could lead to changes in personality.Gestalt therapy suggests that clients should be aware of themselves and see themselves as a whole and not as certain parts or split off of themselves. Gestalt therapy also considers the uniqueness of an individual.
In addition, the gestalt therapy also focuses on “here and now” but at the same time is trying to relate the present with the past. Clients should also be aware of his/her feelings and focus on the “here and now”. And it is through becoming aware of themselves that the clients will develop self acceptance and the ability to experience more in the "now" without so much interference from the past. Basically, the gestalt therapy is to help the client to achieve awareness and live a more contented life. Therefore, the main aim of Gestalt therapy is to assist the client in discovering his or her own capability. Thus, how the client successfully connects or engages with himself/herself and the people around him/her.
d) Transpersonal – from both Maslow and Existential Perspective
Maslow
Human beings are supposed to seek balanced in life. Therefore, it is through the transpersonal approach that clients can seek balanced in life. Transpersonal therapy acknowledges the spiritual aspect of human beings and focuses on the study of humanity’s highest potential. People are said to have experiences or connections with the higher states of consciousness. According to the transpersonal therapeutic goal, it is true prayer, meditation or expressive work that we can actually reached our higher states of consciousness. Furthermore, the therapeutic goal of the transpersonal approach is mainly concerned with human awareness, the integration of psychological and spiritual experience and the transcendence of self.
The transpersonal therapy aim at helping clients to access and develop a deeper relationship spiritually. The aim or goal for the transpersonal therapist is basically trying to help the client to reach divinity. Hence, we can conclude that the simplest definition for transpersonal psychology is spiritual psychology.
Existential Perspective
The therapeutic approach of existential perspective is that is more interested in helping the client find philosophical meaning by choosing to think and act authentically and responsibly. The aim of existential therapy is to help in finding meaning and purpose in life. It is through the suffering, work and love that we can find meaning and purpose in life. The existential therapy believes that people will continuously discover about themselves and in addition they will determine their purpose and meaning in life.
People often face problems related to anxiety, for example when they deal with problems like isolation, despair or death. Therefore, if the client is being exposed to more a meaningful and significant attitude like love, creativity or authenticity then the client is given the potential or opportunity to change into becoming a better person.
Overall, the existential therapeutic goals or aims are to help the client to become more aware of the possibilities that they have and it stresses more on the client’s self-awareness.
Thursday, October 22, 2009
self-reflective essay about my adolescent years (age 12 – 21).
At the age of 12.
I barely remembered what kind of teenager I was when I was 12 years old. But I did remember that I had my first period or menarche at the age of 12. It was a ‘mother-daughter’ moment for me as it happened at home and mom was there for me. Mommy was one of those people in my life at this stage. There were no information or syllabus taught on sex education i.e. reaching puberty at the primary school level in Malaysia. Though most of my primary teachers were female none of them have ever spoken about puberty. I relied on mommy about why I had my periods and why I started wearing bras or anything related to the girls’ stuff.
I had to sit for a public examination when I was in standard 6 or twelve years old. There were five subjects and getting 5A’s was the joyous moment for all twelve years old at this stage. Unfortunately, my result was 4A’s and 1B. It was a heartbreaking moment for me and because of that one stupid subject which was Mathematics I was not in the same class as most of my friends at the secondary school.
At the age of 13-15
When I was 13-15 I did not find school enjoyable at all. It was because my buddies were not in the same class and my form 1 to form 3 classmates were mostly those goody little two shoes. But I still have to (is the word ‘have to’ appropriate Dr Di?) attend school as usual. I was bored staying at home as I am the youngest and the only girl in the family. My two brothers were so annoying and irritating. I often wished I have no brothers and I was hoping that I could be the only child. I was not a spoil-brat either though I am the youngest and the only girl in the family instead I was very much an independent person.
I can do things on my own and I don’t have to rely on anyone especially my two annoying and irritating brothers. I was bullied by them and they often ignored me when I was a little girl. And as I reached my teenage years, I did my own stuff and my brothers did theirs. We were never close and I did not care at all as what matters the most at that time were how I spent times with friends. I wish I had sisters instead of brothers. As for me, brothers suck big time!!!
At the age of 16-17
My adolescent years at the age of 16 – 17 were the best years of my life. I had a great time indeed as a teenager and I wish I could turn back time if I have a time machine (just like
the one in the movie-Back to the Future). At the age of 16-17 attending school was the best thing ever at that time. My classmates were the coolest and they still are (still in touch with them through Facebook). I really enjoyed my school life at the age of 16 – 17 when I was still in secondary school unlike when I was in my lower forms (age 13 -15) I hated school so much. I think peers play an important as peers are the people that will shape what kind of person you will turn to be later in your life. My lower forms classmates were very conservative and narrow-minded. I was a happy-go-lucky person and I enjoyed live to the fullest (and still am) but it seemed that my lower form friends were very focused in their study and most of them were bookworms. I knew of a girl who hated me for no reasons, gosh… how I hated my lower forms classmates especially the girl who hated me for no reasons.
I was a mediocre at school, I was not an excellent student and there were no grand celebrations to celebrate due to my academic performance at school. I was weak in Maths and I did not attend any tuitions. My results for the two major public examinations in secondary schools were just satisfactory.
At the age of 18-20
After my secondary education, I did my tertiary education at a college in Shah Alam. I was still a tomboy at this stage. I always thought that nobody would like me and falling in love with me was way far from my imagination. I met a guy (who was my first love) who studied at Uitm, Shah Alam.
I was so in love with him that it affected me psychologically when our relationship came to an end. I was so frustrated that he dumped me…I just don’t get it till this very day. I did nothing wrong but I was dumped and due to this I cannot concentrate on my study. Therefore, I failed in most of the subjects that I took during my matriculation years. It hurt me so much when that Uitm guy told me that he had to put a full-stop in this relationship.
The people in my life at that time were my friends. My friends were there for me when I broke off with my boyfriend…’life goes on’ according to them and that was what they kept on telling me. I was not close with my parents and definitely not my siblings- I am the youngest and the only girl in my family. I rarely called my mom on the phone and spent more times with friends instead during semester break. It was as if I had a communication breakdown with my parents. The only time that I think that should have a decent conversation with them was when I needed some money.
At the age of 21
In the year 1998 at the age of 21, I was still the same old Saniah – a happy-go-lucky person who enjoyed life to the fullest. I was so… into the underground music that I frequently went to gigs with my best friend. Well, I was exposed to the underground music since I was in secondary school and started going to gigs at the age of 18. I did not like going to discos or pubs but I did go to discos or pubs on several occasions like the Hard Rock café and Planet Hollywood because my favourite bands were performing there. I just love music...I thought of having my own band, yeah…a cool one and I wanted to become the drummer. Unfortunately, due to many obstacles, the band was never established.
I did not focus on my study at this stage. After two years at PPP/ITM, I was fed-up with my study. My aim was to pass the matriculation years and guarantee a place at one of the local universities. Therefore, I often hanged out with one or two friends at the cyber café. The IRC chatting programme was new to us and we found it amusing. We chatted online with strangers and I sometimes played online games. I still can’t get rid of those memories that I had with my ex-boyfriend. Therefore, I chatted with mostly guys of course and ‘created’ a special only online relationship with those guys. However, I had decided not to meet any of those guys as I was afraid that I am going to be heartbroken again.
I barely remembered what kind of teenager I was when I was 12 years old. But I did remember that I had my first period or menarche at the age of 12. It was a ‘mother-daughter’ moment for me as it happened at home and mom was there for me. Mommy was one of those people in my life at this stage. There were no information or syllabus taught on sex education i.e. reaching puberty at the primary school level in Malaysia. Though most of my primary teachers were female none of them have ever spoken about puberty. I relied on mommy about why I had my periods and why I started wearing bras or anything related to the girls’ stuff.
I had to sit for a public examination when I was in standard 6 or twelve years old. There were five subjects and getting 5A’s was the joyous moment for all twelve years old at this stage. Unfortunately, my result was 4A’s and 1B. It was a heartbreaking moment for me and because of that one stupid subject which was Mathematics I was not in the same class as most of my friends at the secondary school.
At the age of 13-15
When I was 13-15 I did not find school enjoyable at all. It was because my buddies were not in the same class and my form 1 to form 3 classmates were mostly those goody little two shoes. But I still have to (is the word ‘have to’ appropriate Dr Di?) attend school as usual. I was bored staying at home as I am the youngest and the only girl in the family. My two brothers were so annoying and irritating. I often wished I have no brothers and I was hoping that I could be the only child. I was not a spoil-brat either though I am the youngest and the only girl in the family instead I was very much an independent person.
I can do things on my own and I don’t have to rely on anyone especially my two annoying and irritating brothers. I was bullied by them and they often ignored me when I was a little girl. And as I reached my teenage years, I did my own stuff and my brothers did theirs. We were never close and I did not care at all as what matters the most at that time were how I spent times with friends. I wish I had sisters instead of brothers. As for me, brothers suck big time!!!
At the age of 16-17
My adolescent years at the age of 16 – 17 were the best years of my life. I had a great time indeed as a teenager and I wish I could turn back time if I have a time machine (just like
the one in the movie-Back to the Future). At the age of 16-17 attending school was the best thing ever at that time. My classmates were the coolest and they still are (still in touch with them through Facebook). I really enjoyed my school life at the age of 16 – 17 when I was still in secondary school unlike when I was in my lower forms (age 13 -15) I hated school so much. I think peers play an important as peers are the people that will shape what kind of person you will turn to be later in your life. My lower forms classmates were very conservative and narrow-minded. I was a happy-go-lucky person and I enjoyed live to the fullest (and still am) but it seemed that my lower form friends were very focused in their study and most of them were bookworms. I knew of a girl who hated me for no reasons, gosh… how I hated my lower forms classmates especially the girl who hated me for no reasons.
I was a mediocre at school, I was not an excellent student and there were no grand celebrations to celebrate due to my academic performance at school. I was weak in Maths and I did not attend any tuitions. My results for the two major public examinations in secondary schools were just satisfactory.
At the age of 18-20
After my secondary education, I did my tertiary education at a college in Shah Alam. I was still a tomboy at this stage. I always thought that nobody would like me and falling in love with me was way far from my imagination. I met a guy (who was my first love) who studied at Uitm, Shah Alam.
I was so in love with him that it affected me psychologically when our relationship came to an end. I was so frustrated that he dumped me…I just don’t get it till this very day. I did nothing wrong but I was dumped and due to this I cannot concentrate on my study. Therefore, I failed in most of the subjects that I took during my matriculation years. It hurt me so much when that Uitm guy told me that he had to put a full-stop in this relationship.
The people in my life at that time were my friends. My friends were there for me when I broke off with my boyfriend…’life goes on’ according to them and that was what they kept on telling me. I was not close with my parents and definitely not my siblings- I am the youngest and the only girl in my family. I rarely called my mom on the phone and spent more times with friends instead during semester break. It was as if I had a communication breakdown with my parents. The only time that I think that should have a decent conversation with them was when I needed some money.
At the age of 21
In the year 1998 at the age of 21, I was still the same old Saniah – a happy-go-lucky person who enjoyed life to the fullest. I was so… into the underground music that I frequently went to gigs with my best friend. Well, I was exposed to the underground music since I was in secondary school and started going to gigs at the age of 18. I did not like going to discos or pubs but I did go to discos or pubs on several occasions like the Hard Rock café and Planet Hollywood because my favourite bands were performing there. I just love music...I thought of having my own band, yeah…a cool one and I wanted to become the drummer. Unfortunately, due to many obstacles, the band was never established.
I did not focus on my study at this stage. After two years at PPP/ITM, I was fed-up with my study. My aim was to pass the matriculation years and guarantee a place at one of the local universities. Therefore, I often hanged out with one or two friends at the cyber café. The IRC chatting programme was new to us and we found it amusing. We chatted online with strangers and I sometimes played online games. I still can’t get rid of those memories that I had with my ex-boyfriend. Therefore, I chatted with mostly guys of course and ‘created’ a special only online relationship with those guys. However, I had decided not to meet any of those guys as I was afraid that I am going to be heartbroken again.
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